I’ve spent the majority of my life comparing myself to other people. It all started with school and athletics. However, as I grew older, I began to compare other factors such as work title (online forex broker in Malaysia), salary level, home size, and worldly achievements. I’ve realised that there is an almost limitless number of categories with which we may compare ourselves, as well as an almost infinite number of persons with whom we can compare ourselves. And, with social media flooding our lives, it’s simpler than ever to find someone “better” to compare ourselves to, which only helps to make us feel worse about ourselves. We’ll never reach the end of that road if we start down it. Comparing ourselves to others is as natural as any other human feeling. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has had similar experiences. However, it is a decision that merely deprives us of delight. How can you stop comparing yourself to others all the time? Here are some helpful hints that have proven to be effective:
- Learn to recognise and avoid your triggers
Start identifying the moments that make you compare yourself to others. Is there anything about particular activities, such as strolling through a high-end shopping mall in KL or driving through an expensive suburb, that makes you feel dissatisfied with your life (even if you were feeling good an hour before)? Make a list of the people and things you often admire or compare yourself to. Write down how each hurts you and why it’s a waste of time. Make a mental note to catch yourself the next time. If at all possible, avoid comparison triggers, especially if the activity or contact adds no significance or actual worth to your life.
- Gratitude should be practised
What began as a basic thankfulness experiment has expanded to include all kinds of delight, big and little, that come into my life. Every morning, I add to the list, and I go back to it whenever I need a reminder of God’s love and goodness in my life.
- Don’t put other people down
Sometimes we try to make ourselves appear or feel better by criticising others. It’s terrible to bring someone else down for your gain. When you may be making a friend, it makes an opponent. That, in the end, harms you as well. Instead, attempt to assist others in their achievement, as this will lead to your success.
- Concentrate on the journey
Don’t get caught up in how you compare to others; life isn’t a competition. It’s going to be a long voyage. We’re all on a quest to discover something, grow into something, learn something, and create something. That path has nothing to do with other people’s achievements or possessions. It’s all about what we want to accomplish and where we want to go. That’s all you have to be concerned about.
- Accept flaws as part of the process
No one is flawless – we all know that intellectually — but we seem to feel horrible when we don’t achieve perfection emotionally. You aren’t and never will be flawless. I’m not one of them, and I’ve come to accept it. Sure, keep trying to improve, but don’t expect to be the “ideal person” any time soon. If you look at it another way, your flaws are what make you who you are, and you are already perfect.